Welcome to the exciting saga of The Long Journey Home!
Saoirse is our carefully & lovingly selected team mascot for the World Cup, sadly (rumour has it) that appears to be where the love and care ended! Rarely seen and often neglected Saoirse didn’t get the chance to make new friends, was locked in a darkened room for the court session, got kidnapped by Picts and thrown in a bin by some Pacific Island Warriors and goodness knows what else!
In spite of all this, when the tournament ended she turned down the chance to go to a loving home, instead deciding to give her Mammy Neasa another chance. However, in typical fashion, Neasa returned home to the West of Ireland without her, leaving Saoirse alone in a hostile, loveless land – relentlessly determined to re-unite with her Mammy.
Ballsy, on the other hand, had a much busier tournament proudly being selected as the Match Ball for most of our outings and never leaving the Team’s side. As a reward for his efforts most of the squad have already autographed him and he was awarded to Laura G as reward for her amazing efforts as Team Manager, in the hope of also settling into a happy home in the Wesht.
Reluctant to be deflated and be a potential inconvenience to Mammy Laura G, Ballsy heroically stepped up to accompany Saoirse and assist her in her challenge to get home.
Here we will take advantage of our spy networks to track their exploits as they plot their return to civilisation!!
We’ll put the latest update at the top for any regular visitors (not that anybody is going to read this!!), so scroll down to the bottom and work back up if you want to see the entire saga!
Day 8, Dublin’s Caves?
As they regained consciousness they heard footsteps in the dark. ‘Sam, you can’t be mean like that. You have to get to know someone first and give them a chance to break your heart before you judge them!’. They figured this must be Liam and agreed that he sounds much nicer than Sam. He looked young to be a widower, but wore his ring around his neck and looked deeply sad. Liam agreed to help them get back on their way, but they also had a quest to save all of existence! This sounded a bit over-dramatic and Saoirse guessed this is why so many are concerned about their mental health and want them to get home!
Some others in the cave overheard Liam’s tale of needing to destroy an artefact and offered to help out. They said they knew the place and a good shortcut to get there. Before long the unusual collection of creatures made their way through Dublin’s sewer network!
Day 7, Hope on All-Ireland Finals Day!
Hope – they seem to have found an ideal place to get noticed. Crowds of people in maroon keep waving and cheering, saying that Sam’s coming home. Others in Orange don’t appear quite as friendly and intimidate by simply saying NO! There’s also a scattering of people in saffron & blue saying F* Sam, we’ve got Liam???
As the crowds re-emerged there was a lot less energy directed towards Saoirse & Ballsy. Heads bowed saying we’ll be back, or unlucky kids maybe next time. As the skies darkened they still waited for those who said they’d be back – Ballsy wished someone cared as much for Saoirse’s whereabouts as they all do for Sam & Liam ๐
The signs don’t appear to be working, tired and desperate Saoirse tried speaking: ‘Gallimh, Gallimh’ she croaked to the short, chubby man with hairy feet – ‘I haven’t got your stinking precious!’ he replied and kicked them into a dark hole. As they flew through the air they heard someone shout ‘Sam, NO!’, their hearts broke a little more to think this was who the fuss was all about??
Day 6, Spotted!
Down but not out! Seals swim, balls float and ice cube trays come in handy!? Cold, wet and exhausted after a long night at sea, but now they’re on home soil with half a bag of humbugs – surely nothing else will go wrong now ๐
Day 5, Phew!
Perhaps it was a swan thing but at the last second some Lir kids swooped down and carried Saoirse & Ballsy all the way to Holyhead, but oh no! What’s this now?
Resigned to never getting past the attentive security guard S&B decided to drown their sorrows and pig out on the last of the salvage!
Fuelled on by the alcohol and sugar rush S&B managed to cling onto the underside of a truck. Sadly for a water animal Saoirse didn’t take too well to the boat. They thought they were blending in well shouting, singing, slurring and being generally offensive, but it wasn’t long until the stowaways were discovered and literally thrown overboard!
Day 4, Disaster!
Everything appeared to be going well for Saoirse & Ballsy, until they hit the back roads of North Wales. Seemingly Daffyd’s counselling had been going well since his Operation Tรขn incarceration, but he too misread the sign, triggering the former Meibion Glyndลตr back to his old ways. Is this the end for our intrepid travellers as the mad Druid dances around them screaming ‘LEAVE OUR LANDS ALONE’ whilst trying to light his soggy box of Swan Vestas
Day 3, Doh!
Sadly the illiterate Americans thought the T was a misplaced L so took Saoirse & Ballsy to the only people they knew in Wales. Unsurprisingly Rob & Ryan weren’t home, but they bumped into a guy called James at the training ground who seemed to understand what they needed, made them a new sign and got them back on the road. Nice guy, but looked a bit old to be a professional sportsman ๐
Day 2, Spotted!
Surviving on fridge salvage the effects of the bowl of salad and fruit were wearing off, so they’re onto the yoghurts ๐ shortly after they were seen in a car brandishing a stars and stripes flag with lots of whooping and cheering ๐๐บ๐ธ
Day 1, Spotted!!
Saoirse & Ballsy seen hitchhiking, trying to get home to their Mammies!
